First to recap. This time last year I was waiting for my two-year post operation cancer check-up. In my mind I had it that I would then be at or near the peak of the recurrence probability, after which the probability started to decrease. This started to raise the question as to what to do with the rest of my earthly sojourn, as it looked increasingly like I was going to have one. At the time I was busy tutoring A level science students and the interaction with the young people was very enjoyable. I was getting increasingly fed up with the pedantry in the exam mark schemes and the lack of flexibility in the “allowed” answers. The “improvements” had created an uncertainty and to my mind were more political than pedagogic. The exams are a business and the whole thing was starting to irk me a little. The young people were carrying a “do what you need to pass the exam” mind-set which they had no doubt picked up from the league table obsessed schools. They were very nice to work with, all of them.
I saw an article in a magazine about photonics clusters and this raised in my mind the possibility of revisiting the start-up community, having done one before. So, I started exploring. A hot topic, as yet unsolved, is quantum computing and more solved, quantum cryptography. I began a technology and science survey. In my mind it seemed that for fully integrate-able devices some kind of photonic optical system was the most likely long-term candidate. What makes a chip fast is the clock frequency, so one would need a high repetition rate source of entangled photons. I trawled through the literature and patents and came up with a patentable putative solution. Now in order to get this off the ground I would need some cash, quite a lot. I could do a proof of principle for about a quarter of a mill. I came up with two possible avenues, one low cash and one high cash. This was predicated by the fact that key-man insurance for a cancer ridden spectre like me is £65k per annum for 2 mill cover. So, either the cash should be so low that that they would waive this insurance or so high that it would not be significant, seemed sensible. The openness to me was better in France and Germany than here in the UK. There is too much history and politics here. In the end I shelved this whole idea as a no-go.
I haven’t tutored this academic year which means that time has passed slowly. I have only one student, who is more mature, and he is a great bloke. I have been doing one tutorial a month. This means that I am in a cash burn situation which cannot go on for ever.
In the back of my mind, is that I am entering my final pinnacle, which is a 1. It will be about being point and /or leadership of some kind.
I have found a lot of closed doors, but none that are open and that have the property of flow as opposed to friction. I am not in the business of arguing the toss or cajoling or chasing any longer. So there has to be flow. When the right door comes along I will know because of this flow.
Since that time, I have written a 250k word blog, which may be the thing I am meant to be doing for now. I put together a trial pamphlet using Kindle publisher and that seems pretty straightforward. I am not overly keen on self-promotion.
Last night I had a dream, which was to do with people in my distant past. In that dream I am using sign language to point them to a road sign. That road sign says, The South. Which is the deep unknown and the place of dreams and dreaming. In the dream I am heading there. And this is where I find myself this morning… Exploring the Sojourn Mystery.