The Irreconcilable

From time to time we can be faced with irreconcilable situations, where there is no obvious solution.

Many of these stem from both and thinking. The moment one lets go of both and, some movement can occur. Whilst both and is clenched hard, stalemate.  In social interaction these can also stem from pride, unwillingness to lose face and sheer bloody mindedness. When there is a lot of positioning and posturing, the irreconcilable can occur fairly frequently.

When world-version and world-rules do not encompass the situation at hand, it is difficult to reconcile that which is held in mind (or internal dialogue) with the events unfolding. Under these circumstances reality can be avoided so that situation “fits” world-version and can therefore be explained therein.

These situations can evoke stress especially in those who want an answer or a solution. It can make people angry and when both and is clenched in fist there can be conflict. Especially when more than one party is keen on both and thinking. Some however love these posturing and negotiating games. It takes all sorts.

The irreconcilable can last in the mind for decades. And the short cut out is to blame other people, the world, the budgerigar or God. This blame game never does reconcile but it can lead to a feeling of righteous indignation and thorough justification. In time this passes and a strange feeling of something not reconciled comes back. In unreconciled situations the logic goes that it always the other party who has to move first so as to bring about reconciliation. This logic can’t be comprehensive.

The irreconcilable is karmic. It is caused by behaviour and attitude. In many cases the ability to reconcile is time dependent, in that there is a window in which it might happen, after that it pretty much ceases to be possible. Some people are more prone to bearing grudges than others and these are not good for well-being. Anything which remains irreconcilable in the self creates a sore point or a button. These can impinge upon freedom and equanimity. To get past one has to cease clenching and start dissolving otherwise the irreconcilable can become markedly disproportionate, it might even turn into something of a personal “demon” that sticks in the craw.

If you think about it carefully the irreconcilable can often stem from will or ambition. When these are in some way thwarted, people don’t have life on their own terms. Many is the person who likes their will be done.

If the outer situation remains irreconcilable then the only recourse is to reconcile internally, by letting go of the ember of it. There is much to be learned from irreconcilable or otherwise apparently impossible situations.