The nagal, the dreamer and the dreamed.

This morning, in the predawn, I have been outside to smoke, as is my custom. In the predawn light I could see our latest visitor not more than a few feet from me. It was a baby bunny hopping about quietly, calmly and unconcerned by me. I could not assimilate his whole shape, but his fluffy white tail caught the eye. I knew which end was which. I am a little concerned for him as daylight dawns. But maybe he has a good strategy, being so close to the house might offer him some protection. In the twilight between wake and sleep, many of us drift and to some this is very nice. We may not be sure what is the dreamer and what is the dreamed.

That which speaks to each of us varies and that may be due to our upbringing, its attendant prejudices and our own predilection. In the video previous there is talk of THE spirit dreaming the world into being. In the Toltec tradition this is called Nagal. As the stages of the dreaming progress the Nagal divides itself into the dreamers like the barramundi and the dream goes on. The dreamers dream in the rest of the manifested universe. In a human sense we have spirit, soul and physical plane being; the nagal, the dreamer and the dreamed. The dreamer pretty much corresponds to the idea of the soul. It is the real you, not the social being full of angsts. Thus, to listen to the dreams of your dreamer is to dream true to you own soul. To me this sounds good, it has a lovely feel to it and it speaks to me. Learning to dream true is to become a fully ensouled being in which you are en rapport with your soul. I don’t know about you but as a goal, this isn’t so bad. Learning to dream true is a part of the way to freedom and liberation. In a sense this means giving over the dreamed to the dreamer. One could say hand over the steering wheel of your car, your vehicle, to your soul. If the dreamed is a bit of a control freak it will be more than a little prone to back seat driving.

At this the twilight between night and day, I offer this up.

Learn to dream true, so that the dreams of the dreamer are made real, hence to climb the “ladder” up to the spirit.

So that in time the nagal, the dreamer and the dreamed can be as one and at one.

Those Little Deaths

Each day we die a little, this is true, but there can me more than one kind of death. Every time we succumb to our fear and fail to let our spirit shine or at least glow a bit, then something in us dies. That death can be slow, demoralising and painful. At one stage or another, I suspect that each being knows when this happens. Under certain circumstances these can haunt us. Recently we saw Slobodan Praljak drink poison in a court in Den Haag. Many would be outraged that he escaped “justice”. I personally rejoiced for him, a strange thing to rejoice perhaps. But at 72 he still had the balls to do such a thing. Irrespective of what he may have done, his spirit rose in him and he raised a parting two fingers to the world for all to see. It was in a way, magnificent.

Faced with a moral dilemma, loss of social acceptance, the fear of making a faux pas, we suppress our spirit over and over and over. I am not saying that we need make a grand gesture, but we might stick our necks out a little more often. Otherwise we die a little inside. And it is that inner death which is the more deadly. I have long been fascinated with the Petrine denial, it is an allegory for the little deaths we each partake of. Asked if he knew that man, he said no despite having professed his love. When push came to shove, he bottled. Of course, the circumstances were risky, but the same thing is played out under much more benign circumstances in the lives of most of us. And when we do this, we die a little. After a while we cower. Before long, our spirit lies broken and we are more of a shell, than a vital being.

These little deaths happen at key fleeting moments, the clock cannot be turned back and our opportunity to show our mettle as a human being, has passed. In doing this we demonstrate our lack of cojones. It is safer to live in the sardine-tin. But is it really all that safe, in terms of our self-esteem, our spirit and how we view ourselves? If we are forever being conservative and sensible, are we really trying to hide our basic lack of courage and then justify it away? It is for each being to decide.

If you want to find freedom, then it is necessary to let the spirit within you surface, otherwise you will not have the wherewithal needed. Without this courage, you will not be able to step outside the encircled wagons, for fear of rampant Apache, even when there are none.

Fleeting Moments

It is around fleeting moments that the entire world or a life, can pivot. In retrospect we may be able to see them. But by the time we are retrospective the moment has long passed. What might have been, cannot now be. The significance of fleeting moments can be severely underestimated. We may place that last straw on the camel’s back, unaware that we are doing this. There could be those few seconds in which we could have plucked up courage, but failed to do so. We might make a Petrine denial so as to avoid something. Sometimes we notice the instant a fleeting moment has passed and rue the day. Other times we feel justified in letting a moment pass. Most often we are too asleep, too distracted, or our head is so far up our own arse that we do not sense an incoming fleeting moment, maybe we just don’t want to see them. If we take life for granted, we squander fleeting moments. There is not some chap with a big sign, upon which there is hand pointing to the moment which says; “this is really important”. Many of these fleeting moments are subtle and nuanced. Some fleeting moments pertain entirely to The Spirit and in those our natures are tested by the universe.

Advertisers tell us; “don’t miss out on this deal”. Many like a bargain and a “buy one get one free”. These are not really fleeting moments, they are the artifice of marketing. People pay more attention to these than the real fleeting moments. In business people speak of opportunity and a good salesman can sniff a potential lead like a thirsty man in the desert smells water. But not all opportunities are obvious and many look like hard work. If you are a pushy salesman type, you may be attuned to only one general type of opportunity. Many are just under our noses and these are the hardest to see, it seems.

Fleeting moments can be like an aperture in space-time, they are only open for a while, beyond them lies a whole new range of possibilities. Unless one steps through the aperture, it closes, perhaps never to open again. These moments are fleeting and short.

The only way to appreciate all those fleeting moments is to be fully present in the now. If you blunder through life like an amphetamine fuelled bull in a china shop, you will smash the delicate porcelain of these moments, willy-nilly. To see a fleeting moment, one has to be awake, and not dozing. If one is raging, one is more than a little blind. The red mist has you.

It is out of fleeting moments that the Eternal Now is constructed or made. That is the awareness sees fleeting moments blending softly into each other, fully aware, the potential significance of each is weighted. Then live, in the now, one must decide, choose and act. For at each fleeting moment there is choice, life is a step-wise continuum of choices, always. The more awake and present you are, the more conscious you become about instantaneous choice of action. Life is a summation of fleeting moments, a sum and not yet quite an integral. The more aware you are, the more integrated you become and life flows better. It is not quite so step-function and jerky. The more awake you are the less likely it is that you behave like a jerk.

It is the active ongoing sum of all fleeting moments which makes the Eternal Now.